Last week’s post on taking yourself on a date sparked some interesting comments and insights. I really enjoyed hearing all that you had to say on the topic. A few of you shared how you enjoyed going out by yourself and meeting new and interesting people. That is awesome! Others confessed that they have been bravely stepping out on their own but still felt a little bit awkward, self-conscious, and even judged by other people. I understand completely how you feel! Sometimes it gets to me and I have been stepping out on my own for years.
So, this week I would like to follow-up on ways to let go of what other people think. The act of letting go of what people think not is probably one of the most effective things we can do lead a fabulous and fulfilling life .Single or married, we all come across situations in which we feel people are watching us and forming opinions about who we are. It goes beyond whether we can go to the movies or a restaurant by ours selves, it involves us being strong enough to live the life we are meant to live.
Here are some ways to help you let go of what others think:
Realize most people are really not paying attention. One great truth of our modern world is that as a people we are very self-absorbed. So if you go to the movie theater alone, unless you inadvertently cut someone off in the line for popcorn, a good number of people will not even take notice that you are there. That goes for just about any situation you can create in your mind.
Understand it has noting to do with you. People generally relate the world to themselves.The people who give you a look of pity or judgement are actually projecting their fears and judgement of themselves onto you. They may fear being alone so that turns into pity for you. You do not need pity. They need self-confidence.
Be confident in who you are. Walk, talk, and dress like the amazing person you are. Confidence attracts people. It is less likely that anyone is going to pity you if look strong and happy. If they do, just give a self-assured smile and let it bounce right off you.
Be the poster child for loving the life you are living. You are working hard to build an amazing and fabulous life. Show people why your lifestyle is working for you with actions and words. Let it be seen that the stereotypes or preconceived ideas about your life they may have about you fall far short of reality by the smile on your face and the confident spring in your step.
Stop trying to guess what other people are thinking. I don’t know about you but I am a master of creating really crazy scenarios in my mind and then convincing myself they may actually be true. The frown on someone’s face may not be so much a look of judgement but the result of an ingrown toenail. The teenage girls whispering may be actually talking about the cute boy working at the concession stand. Just as some people project their fears onto us, sometimes we project our fears on to other people.
Building self-confidence and letting go of what others think is an ongoing process. I work on it daily. I am far more confident than I was ten years ago and that is a good start. 🙂
How about you do you have any tips, ideas, or stories you would like to share? As always, I would love to hear from you!
Until next time, Laura