Single Living: Be Confident Enough To Take Yourself Out On A Date

Happy Single Living Thursday, Everyone!

hartSometimes it is difficult and uncomfortable doing things alone. Being single, I am used to doing things by myself without much thought. Despite my usual comfort of going it alone, sometimes I am nervous or intimidated to be in public by my self.

Last summer I had an experience that caught me a little off guard. I wanted to walk around Dinosaur Ridge in Morrison Colorado . It was getting late into the summer and I wanted to go before it got too chilly in the mornings. I had asked several friends if they wanted to go but the timing just didn’t work for them. Since I was interested in the guided tour I needed to make reservations. When I called to make the reservations the young man taking the reservation asked me how many were in my party. Without a second though I said ” Just me.” There was a noticeable silence which seemed to last an eternity. Finally,  the young man replied ” Oh well, maybe you will meet someone. ” I was totally taken aback and suddenly felt very self-conscious about my single status. Fortunately, I did not let this comment keep me from heading down to Dinosaur Ridge on my own. I did meet many people on that particular day who were great company during the tour. A mother and daughter from North Carolina, two ladies from Europe, a   friendly young lady from Boulder Colorado, a retired geologist, and several other people interested in dinosaur fossils and ancient Colorado. It was a fabulous way to spend a  Saturday. I could have easily missed this great day and good conversation if I had caved in to my initial self-consciousness about going by myself.

Everyone likes going out on  date. It is a break from our regular routine and a good date makes us feel special and a little bit pampered. We dress to impress our date, taking extra care to make sure we look our best. We pick special activities  such as a concert, a hike, or a nice restaurant. We want our date to see us at our best we want them to feel special as well. When it is a particularly good date and we really enjoy the other person’s company, we can not wait to see that person again.

I believe every once in a while we should take ourselves out on a date. This is a great practice whether a person is married or single. If you are interested in attending the new art exhibit at the art museum , why not put on a fabulous outfit and go yourself? You could even stop for lunch at the new cafe you have been wanting to try out  and pick up a fresh bouquet of flowers or a bottle of wine on the way home. Do anything that makes yourself feel special and a little spoiled.

I will be the first to admit that attending things alone can be uncomfortable at times. Know what your comfort zone is. When I go to a play, movie, or restaurant by myself I tend to feel more comfortable attending these events in the afternoon rather than in the evening. However, I have gone to evening performances and quite enjoyed myself.  Start with activities that you enjoy are comfortable doing alone and challenge yourself gradually to try doing things you may otherwise miss out on if no one else is around to do them with you.

 Single Date Ideas :

  • Go on a bike ride
  • Tale a Hike
  • Have a picnic in the park
  • Attend an outdoor concert  in the park
  •  Go to an art museum
  • Visit a zoo
  • Go antique shopping
  • Try horse back riding
  • Check out a local book store and coffee shop
  • Try a new restaurant or cafe
  • See a play or musical
  • Go to a matinée

( It is a good idea if you are hiking or doing an activity where you may be isolated to let people know where you are going and at what time.)

Finally, do it right. Take the time to look attractive to anyone you may run into. Use your favorite perfume or cologne. Treat yourself to flowers, desert, or a  locally brewed beer. Whatever will make your day a little more special.

Do you have any ideas for taking yourself on a date? I would love to hear your thoughts.

Until next time,

Laura

 

 

 

 

 

4 comments

  • Have you noticed how you meet all sorts if interesting people whee you are out and about on your own? I’ve done a lot alone over the years, also extensive traveling and I seem to meet people more when I’m on my own, maybe because I’m more open to start up a conversation, and maybe it’s easier for people to start up conversation when they see you alone, it’s almost like they find it a higher threshold striking up a conversation when you travel with someone else. Some of my best friends I’ve met traveling alone 🙂

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    • Yes, I do think you can meet very interesting people when you are out on your own. 🙂 I think it is often easier to engage one person in a conversation rather than a couple. How cool that you have made good friends traveling alone!

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  • This was so great. It’s like you looked in my brain and wrote this! Sometimes I miss out on things when I don’t go just because I’d be by myself. I regret it every time. I went to the movies by myself for the first time this past summer. It was in the afternoon, and I felt fine. I’m not sure I’m brave enough to go in the evening or on a weekend though! I’ll work on it. I guess my biggest problem is thinking people feel sorry for me. (Kinda like the guy on the phone to you.) Any tips on how to get over that? Great post! Very encouraging to me!

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    • Thanks, I am glad you enjoyed the post 🙂 Good for you for going to the movies by yourself. I would do a weekend matinee before an evening movie to break yourself in. I did go see the Dr. Who movie this winter in the evening and it was not intimidating at all. I think it was because I knew I was in a theater full of Dr. Who fans.
      I think every single person feels very self conscious about what others are thinking about them from time to time. I try to keep things in perspective and remind myself that I am the only person who is in control of my happiness or misery. I also make it my mission to show by actions and lifestyle that single people have fantastic lives. Your blog is a testament to that. 🙂
      I will do a post next Thursday about getting over how people perceive single people and dealing with negative stereo types.

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